A reply to Mark's letter

Mark, I read your letter when I was overseas. I was with my family at Fort Siloso beach, Sentosa and I read your email on a Friday evening. I think I was the first one who read it twice. I was touched by your brutally honest sharing. You kept nothing to yourself. You just let it all out and I drank of every word written as if you were sharing your heart out to me by the beach under the retiring sun.

Your words were simple yet deep. It spoke volumes of your current dilemma and your trust in a faithful God who will deliver you and your family out of it. You mentioned about seeking financial help from your loved ones, one of whom was not a Christian. You wrote about what was left in your bank account and how your income has been slashed by 70%. You told us how you lost your investment money and how you took the chance to invest borrowed funds, which, after a harrowing episode, paid off quite handsomely. Indeed, these few months have been a roller coaster ride for you and your family - and the ride is, I believe, still ongoing with all its ups and downs!

Yours was a heartfelt, heart-tugging testimony that very few men I know would want to share. I appreciate your honesty and am emboldened by your steadfast faith, anchored on trust and hope. I held these words you wrote close to my heart, "God will not allow us to go thru' any crisis without first allowing it to go thru' His hands." You illuminated simple truths to us and I believe we are wiser by your sharing. Your scars and experiences in this life have grounded us all on the assurance that God is still in control of everything. Indeed, it is said, "Blessed are the cracked, for they let in light." Thanks for the light.

One issue that kept me up on Friday night was the relationship issues. Most of what you shared, that is, the financial crisis, the reduction in income, the borrowing and the investing, and the financial dire straits in general, were all external things that happened to you. As you wrote about these external circumstances, you exude a tide of quiet confidence as if things were going to be alright sooner than later. In other words, you were on top of things and stayed on top of things. But when it came to relationship, that is, issues of the heart, or things of an inner nature, you gave the impression that you were still quite unresolved, seething and at times, ruffled.

Trust me, I understand how you feel. I have dealt with many people before and they come in all shapes and sizes. Some were saint-like and you'd wish the world is composed of more of this Mother-Theresa characters. But once in a while, when the moon is blue and the sun doesn't rise from the east, you encounter a character that defies all appeal to reason. These are the people who, in my own experiences, makes life bend backward to breaking point. You can call them "toxic character" or "emotional refrigerator" or "personality flaws." But you cannot avoid them. They can be your friends, your loved ones or your acquaintance. They are here for good; even though most of the time, they are here for bad. Sometimes, we even see some of these undesirable qualities in ourselves.

I believe that they are planted on this earth to rub you on the wrong side. That is, provided, you allow them to rub you on the wrong side. You can always offer your right side to them or your better side. And I believe, knowing you, Mark and Jasmine, you guys have offered them your best side like a good Samaritan would. However, time and time again, they reciprocated in ways that befuddled or stumped you guys.

Well, the best explanation for their behavior is the parable of the sower. This parable clears the air about good and not-so-good Christians. You guys know the parable well (Matthew 13:3-9). The one thing constant and unchanging about the parable is the seed. You will notice that the seed is the same for all four grounds: that is, on the pathway where birds came and snatched them away, on the rocky ground where the soil had no depth and the sun burnt up the seeds, on the thorns where the seeds were choked, and lastly, on good soil. This parable applies to all Christians, young and old. If we take the seeds as the word of God, we then understand why many Christians can remain untouched by the gospel of truth.

Well, Mark, we can use this parable to explain why some Christian act the way they did. But I think we should not stop there. I believe the focus of the parable should be on the good soil and how the good soil can make a difference in the lives of others. Sure, there are Christians who preach more than they practise. They do not live up to basic expectations. They profess to be wise but act otherwise. But I've always pictured the ending of the parable of the sower where the tree that grew out of the good soil stretched out to become a canopy of shelter and protection for the seeds that fell on the other grounds.

In other words, the tree that grew could provide coverage from the scorching sun or divert the birds away from the exposed seeds. Even those seeds that fell on thorns could derive some nutrients from the roots of the good tree. This might sound like allegorical stretch of the parable but my point is to focus on what authentic Christians can do or say to make a difference in the lives of those Christians who do not live up. Isn't this why Jesus came to us in the first place? To show the way, to be an example, to change lives, to love unconditionally. Our calling is no different. In fact, 1 John 4:20 raised the bar, by admonishing this, "For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen."

From the lives of great saints, who were usually ordinary people with simple, trusting faith, you will note that they shared three landmark characteristics: First, they were absurdly happy; second, they were filled with irrational love for everyone; and lastly, they were always in trouble.

Mark and Jasmine, your lives in the cell and from what I gather from your letter do indeed exemplify Christlikeness. I do not doubt your sincerity in your acts of kindness. At this point, I am reminded of this adage, "In each life, some rain will fall." By extension, life is going to challenge you. Christians are sometimes lightning rods for trouble. We are magnets for bad times and bad relationships. Mark, you even wrote, "if you pray for more faith, then be ready for more challenges ahead."

I believe that praying for faith is only the first part. The other integral part is having the confidence and endurance to overcome the challenges that test our faith. This is best explained in Hebrew 10:36, "Therefore do not cast away your confidence, which has great reward. For you have need of endurance, so that after you have done the will of God, you may receive the promise."

Mark, our faith is on God and His promises to deliver us. But for every case of deliverance, there is at least ten cases of endurance (if not more). Deliverance is the final relief of our suffering. But before attaining such relief, we have to undergo painful and uncertain challenges that at times seem hopeless and unremitting. Your current circumstance is just one of those cases of endurance. We know that the world economy isn't getting better. Nobody knows how the billions of dollars of cash injection will turn out. Government policies may sometimes backfire. Ultimately, it depends on the confidence or the whims and fancies of the world markets. That in itself says nothing about anything, I know. So, I dread to say that it is going to take a while for the economy and the markets to recover and to rally up. Of course, I don't need to tell you this. You basically live in it on a daily basis.

But your continual faith and hope in God and how the dark skies are going to
clear ultimately breathe renewed hope in my life. I guess I can share everything I read from "dead pulp" books every Friday and still fall short of changing and impacting lives as compare to the inspiring lessons that your personal experiences bring. You guys have gone through the grief of your father's death and the trauma of Kaela's birth and yet Jasmine and you remained strong and firm in the faith. That is one lesson that no amount of reading and sharing can effectively impart.

Let me end with this inspiring story told by Ray Pritchard, who authored The God you can Trust, "A small boy was flying a kite high in the sky when it drifted into a cloud bank and disappeared from view. A passerby asked the little boy what he was doing. "I'm flying my kite," the child responded. The man, looking up and seeing only the cloud bank , said, "I don't see any kite. How do you know it's still there?"

"I don't see it either," replied the boy, "but I know it's up there because every once in a while there's a tug on my string."

Mark, last cell meeting we talked about five things we cannot change but just have to accept and grow around them. One of those things is the fact that "everything changes and ends." Good times never last. Neither do Bad times. But it is not the bad times that we loathe. It is the time it takes for bad times to become good times. Sometimes, it takes a while and our faith is truly tested. But during such times, the simple words of the little boy can turn the focus away from our problem and onto God. Mark, God still tugs at your heartstring occasionally to remind you that he is still there. He's in control. He will keep your kite afloat. He will see you and your family through and the dark clouds will soon be blown away. So, when your circumstances seem to cast a foreboding shadow over your heaven-bound focus, just remember this, your God is bigger than the storm!